such a tease...i'm in love

so there's this band i really really like called The Hush Sound, and when i was making a concert list for our radio station's weekly mini-newspaper, saw that they had a show at the creepy crawl tonight (sat. night) but also one in vintage vinyl in the afternoon. since i was working, and needed the hours and figured i couldn't get off, i decided just to go to vintage vinyl. so i go with my friend mary kate, and we listen to these two groups that go before them. This Providence was first, and they were alright, a little whiny for my taste. Murdered By Death was next, and he was amazing. i don't know if it's just this one guy and perhaps the rest were missing, but he was fantastic. a very johnny cash-feel to him, and he was so skinny minny and handsome and suddenly this deep bass voice just erupts and he sang these incredibly melancholy and heavy songs and now i MUST get his music--you all should, too.
anyways, then The Hush Sound comes out. the first two groups only played two songs, and it turned out so did the hush sound! the stuff at vintage vinyl was just a teaser for the real show that night--i was so upset because they're really good live. actually, let me rephrase that. they sound awesome live, but they're very new and don't have a lot of stage presence yet. the girl was really nervous looking, too. i was so sad because i really wanted to go to that show, and i just looked up their tour dates and we were one of their first stops and who knows when they'll be back. however, they'll be in chicago on the 17th of december (that was their starting point) so i might gather some peeps and see them that night (if anyone would be interested in a 24-hour car trip, let me know and we'll plan it).
anyways, so This Providence and The Hush Sound were doing autographs and stuff at the end. so i get an autograph and a picture with This Providence to be polite (and hey, if they take off, i'll have these cool keepsakes, right?) and then i got to meet The Hush Sound! you could so tell that they're really new at this--i started talking, and none of them said much, and i told them they did a great job and could i have an autograph and picture, yadda yadda....but they were so quiet, and i kept babbling (i don't even remember what i said, i'm that ridiculous, i completely lost my head--i remember this one really cute member of the band looking at me with confusion, and, possibly, pity?) and they asked if i was going to the concert and i was so sad to have to tell them no, and that i was working! what a lame reason. and i mentioned how i was writing an article about them for our radio show's music newsletter (hoping they would offer an interview sometime) and how i was at vintage vinyl when i first heard their cd. i'm such an idiot! i never know when to shut my mouth.
basically, it was really fun and i'm competely kicking myself for not trying harder to go to the concert. part of the reason i'm so depressed is because i'm on my period and i'm in a bad mood, but i'm just so jealous of them and mad i didn't get to see the concert. i'm jealous because here they are, doing something cool, and they have a ton of talent, and they're doing what they love. all i could think about was my fucking chem test on wednesday and thought, why am i trying to be a nurse? this is ridiculous--science makes me cranky and it's not fulfilling. why am i too scared to just do theatre, and why do i have no confidence when i try to act? i have confidence when it comes to theatre, and that's part of what's holding me back. i'm so confused about what i want to do with my life, and this afternoon totally made it worse.
however, i also went to ragarama and got an awesome sweater vest, and this cool shirt. and then i went to smoothie king, and two members of The Hush Sound walked out right before i went in. they drink smoothies!
anyways, i just worked six and a half hours and i worked six and a half hours last night too, and i'm about to work six hours tomorrow beginning at 11 a.m, so i'm gonna go. i'm sorry this is so long, and if you're reading this sentence, thank you for reading this whole thing. bye bye.